i was just thinking about my life
i brought out my diary to read
then i realised that i changed alot
i used to have quite a number of friends
frens that i'd hang out with
but i never cld or did tell them wat really mattered to me
what really bothered me
but its interesting
to look back
and see how i interacted with ppl last time
then i logged onto my friendster (gosh its like so outdated right...)
and i went to read wat they used to write about me
wat ppl said to me were all abt the same
but then there was this person
he said this
"mich is the nicest troubled gerl that i noe... the gerl that doesnt really show it out to people..."
i dun talk to him anymore
i just see him the other day thou
but anyways
i realised
now that i really think about it
he really did care
he was really a good friend
and i am regretting that i never maintained my friendship with him
thou we always insulted each other
but we never meant it in a bad way
that was just the way we were
tt was the way our friendship was
he was really a very nice person
a very nice friend to me when i was down
and i let the friendship go away
it sux to know that
i'm sorry that it happened
it happened alot
and it upsets me
i know its partially my fault
but sighs
i dunno what to do to stop it from happening..
even thou years have passed
but i still think the same way
my thoughts never really changed much
wonder if tts good or bad
but o wells
i dunno..
reading my diaries bring back a lot of memories..
good and bad
and even thou i know that most ppl dun read my blog
but i want to thank all those
all my friends at each point of time in my life, for being there for me, even thou i dun talk to them anymore and they wun ever see this
haiz
i really miss some of the friendships that i used to have..

anyways
i read further on
till the time i knew darrel
till the time i got together with darrel
i recorded down the things he used to say to me, do for me
it confirms my thought
that i have a wonderful and very sweet boyfriend:)
he'd been so nice to me right from the start
he was so patient with me
he loved me for who i was even when i din
he showed me that love is really unconditional
and i really love him
with everything that i have
i'm so glad to have him
right at the start
he once told me
"i just counted my blessings, and you played a big part in them"
well..
he's a great blessing to me
he's such an important part of my life now
i cannot imagine life without him
i love darrel alot